Comin' Outta My Head

Today's thoughts:

Lately, I feel like I've been falling down a big, dark, hole and I can't find my way out.  The depression feels like it's crushing me.  I was on a phone conversation with my best friend last night and told her that I couldn't think of one thing that gave my life a little sparkle.  UGH.  I hate feeling like this.  I've made an appointment with my doctor to see if I should adjust my medication, but I think the problem is much bigger than some adjustment in my anti-depressants. 

Mel Gibson is such a fuckhead.  I hope these taped conversations that his girlfriend recorded will be the final nail in the coffin that is his career.  I'm sick of seeing his stupid face on the television, and find him completely disgusting.  In every way.  Who knew Mad Max was such a racist, misogynistic asshole?  However, I do find the tiniest bit of delight in his quote of "you should just smile and blow me".  I think I'm going to have to make that little gem mine.  It's just filled with all kinds of awesome. 

Michigan has been going through a heat wave and I can't decide if I love it or hate it.  The past few summers really sucked ass -- it was a banner day if it got above 80 degrees.  I froze my ass off during the 4th of July weekends in the past -- wearing jeans, sweatshirts, etc. to watch fireworks.  This year, the weather has come back with a vengance.  Lots and lots of days in the high 80s and we even had a heat wave where the temps were in the high 90s.  Granted, I'm sweating my ass off everywhere I go this summer, but I think I'm kind of digging it.

My mom gets on my fucking nerves.  But you may had already known that.  If not, well, there you go.  I love her to death but seriously.  I'm one more guilt trip away from being committed to the psych ward.

I know I haven't given any client updates lately, and last night, I met a real kook.  She was 27 years old and came in with her mom.  She has a 3-year-old daughter.  The babydaddy took their daughter from the babymomma in early June and she hasn't seen her since.  She wants to sue babydaddy so she can get her kid back.  Seems relatively simple, right?  OH NOoooo.  During the conversation we find out that babymomma is bipolar, has previously been a heroin addict (and was on methadone when she found out she was pregnant), stole her mother's credit card (her mother prosecuted her), and has previously been arrested for retail fraud/shoplifiting.  There might be more that I can't think of off the top of my head.  OH.  She also has her driver's license taken away because she was driving on a suspended license.  Her license was suspended because she didn't pay a ticket or something.  I felt like telling her there's not a snowball's chance in hell that she's getting her kid back.  Especially, considering babymomma's mother is really the one who took care of the kid.  Like everyday.  I don't even want to get involved in this case.  It's a fucking mess.  But shit like this is what keeps me coming into work everyday.  Name another job where you get to deal with personal drama that doesn't involve a prison?  Maybe a psychiatrist/psychologist.  Other than that, I can't think of one.  And then I was getting all pissed off because here's this woman who can't even take care of her own child, and there's millions of people out there who want children and can't have them.  Ridiculous.

I've decided that I am never going to understand Men.  Ever.  And no offense to any of my male readers, but I think the world would be a much better place to live in if it were all women.  I remember reading a novel called "The Female Man" in college.  It was about a place, a utopia, where it was all women, and men were only used for breeding purposes.  My utopia would be a little different.  Men would need to be used for breeding purposes of course, but I'd also add doing any labor-intensive job (like farming or construction, you get the idea) and definitely for killing spiders (and other creepy-crawlies) in the house. 

What's been running around your brain lately?