I started my new job yesterday. Not that I was looking forward to it, because a) I got used to staying at home and b) I got used to not having to get up at the ass-crack of dawn. BUT, I tried to keep a positive attitude yesterday as I embarked on a new chapter in my life.
Of course, I was already grumbling at 5:30am when my alarm went off. The grumbling continued when I had to drop Daughter off at school at 6:30am because I felt bad for her (even though she was all excited to go to school so early and play with the kids at latchkey -- I was projecting my feelings on to her.) The grumbling continued throughout the day, when I found out I was going to be massively micro-managed at this job -- I have to punch a timeclock, don't dare be one minute late EVER, don't ever think about taking time off, don't ever call in sick, just don't ever do anything. I kept thinking to myself that I am 37 years old, and I am too old for this shit. And my temper got all flared up over this -- even though I pretty much kept it to myself.
To top it off, the training is so boring I want to slit my wrists and bleed out on the bathroom floor. The trainer, while I am sure is a perfectly nice woman, couldn't be less enthusiastic about the material or getting us trained. Then -- the material itself. I spent all of yesterday in a constant state of "What the Fuck?" because we basically were reviewing engineering specs for automotive parts all freaking day. I kept thinking this is why I wasn't an engineer. I barely understood anything.
I'll describe the job -- I will be a "search and retrieval specialist" -- when someone sues GM, after being in a car accident, we receive a letter from the attorneys, who are in pre-discovery mode. They are requesting all kinds of documents such as drawings of the parts of the car that were involved in the accident (ex: air bag, rooftop (for rollover accidents), wheel axels, etc.) and then all associated parts and also all information on other vehicles that were made on the same automotive platform. They also request test reports and other documents I haven't even figured out. I hate it.
Which is why I am awake at 5:00 am updating my blog with a pounding headache. I couldn't sleep all night and am worried about this job. Already.
On the bright side -- which despite me having the same shitty attitude, I really do try and find the silver lining because it's the only thing that keeps me going....they eliminated the afternoon shift and I will be able to hold daytime hours like a normal working grunt. Bright side = seeing and spending time with my family and also still being able to do my Pure Romance parties. Of course, part of me was still bitching about the bright side, because I had accepted the fact I would be working afternoons and was in that mindset.
I will never, ever be happy. I was complaining to my mother yesterday and she was so happy she about shit herself. She was happy regarding the material I will be researching and she was happy that they moved the job to the day shift. I was irritated because she was not being supportive of me in my complaints. I should be used to it by now.
My alarm just went off...guess I need to try and adjust my attitude and keep an open mind for today. As a sidenote -- my alarm is a iHome and my iPod just went off as I mentioned...the song playing is Miley Cyrus' "I Can't Wait to See You Again". This is notworthy for two reasons. 1) I didn't download this song to my iPod because I haven't downloaded songs in a very long time...which brings me to interesting point #2 -- if I didn't do it, it means Husband did. Who knew he was such a Miley fan???? I'm dying, y'all. Of course, if I were to call him out on it, he'd say he downloaded it on "accident". His secret is safe with me....oh, and all of you now too! :)