I went for an interview today with the Michigan National Guard for their Judge Advocate General (JAG) Corps. I had to drive about 100 miles to get there (one way). Once I got there, I was supposed to see Captain America (not his real name, obvs...but I must protect the innocent). I ask for Captain America and once I introduce myself and tell him we had a 10:00 a.m. appointment, his all-American face is oh-so-very puzzled. Like my name and the fact that we have an appointment doesn't ring a bell kind of puzzled.
Oh, I see we are starting off on the right foot, aren't we?
It gets better. He acts like he had NO FUCKING IDEA I was supposed to be there. I do the polite thing and tell him that if this is a bad time, I can come back (and trust me, if he had told me to come back there was NO WAY IN HELL I was coming back, considering it took me nearly 2 hours to find the place). I even resorted to showing him the confirmation email I received regarding our appointment. It's December 5th isn't it? So we do the interview.
Going into the interview, I was under the impression (from the recruiter) that the JAG Corps was in desperate need of lawyers. Speaking to Captain America -- who told me there are only 17 lawyers in the whole state, and only 2 of them are on "active" duty -- that despite there being buttloads of work to do, he really only needed lawyers who were experienced in litigation.
I have no litigation experience.
I also found out that "for sure", because, after all, Captain America doesn't want to "bullshit" me -- that if I were to join the JAG...I'd be deployed "overseas" (read: The Middle East) immediately after training, and that deployment would last one year.
FUCK THAT PEOPLE. I didn't like those odds.
So I pretty much bid Captain America adieu and went on my merry way back home. Only to be grilled by Husband for nearly an hour about how I should still consider joining. I FLAT OUT told him that there was no way -- hear me? -- NO FUCKING WAY I was joining when there would be a 100% chance that I would have to leave my daughter for one year. Nevermind the 6 months of training when I would be away. Want to know what his response was? Go ahead. Ask me. Please....
He said that I would be given leaves and that I would still see her.
That's when I had to crush his hopes of being married to a JAG Officer once and for all. FLAT OUT. And please don't get me wrong. I admire the men and women who serve this country with all my heart and soul. I'm just too old and too set in the ways of being with my kid where I want to sacrifice any more time away from her (the four years I spent in law school were enough time away).
Oh, and the best part of the interview? Captain America asked me if I had considered joining one of their other units -- specifically, the Human Resources branch. He mentioned this because all of my pre-law school work experience was in Human Resources. I told him, no, I was pretty much focused on legal positions, I mean, considering the schooling and the student loan and the fucking 2 years I spent trying to pass the goddamm Bar exam.
Seriously? WHAT THEE FUCK CAPTAIN AMERICA? You can't be serious? Dude, I look forward not backward. If I had loved HR that much, I would have stayed there instead of investing 7 years of my life and $100k into a legal career.