Thursday, June 17, 2010

I Think I Need to Adjust My Meds

I feel like I've been on an angry rampage for the past several days.  I nearly snapped in two every night this week, and now I'm starting to wonder if the problem isn't everyone else, but is me.  I know, I know, it can't possibly be me...but maybe it is?

For example:  Monday night
I'm driving on my way home from work and Husband asks me if I can take Daughter to the video game store (a promise made to her by HIM) because she got a good report card.  He had been promising to take her for days, and on Monday, told her FOR SURE they would go on Tuesday.  He was too tired (or whatever) to take her on Tuesday, and was trying to get me to do it.

After pleading with Daughter to see if we could go Wednesday (she wouldn't budge), FINE.  I WILL TAKE HER.  Even though she was acting like the most OBNOXIOUS PERSON ON THE PLANET.  Like typical kid-shit.  Being sassy and smirking and shit like that.  You should know, when I'm not in the mood, being sassy and smirking and shit like that gets on my last fucking nerve and I swear I could snap and go on a murderous rampage, killing everyone in a one-mile radius.  So I was already on edge when we were getting ready to go.  Honestly, I wanted to fucking beat the living shit out of Daughter.  But we go buy the game and I bought some scrapbooking stickers (i.e., retail therapy) and I calmed the fuck down.  But still.  I was thisclose to snapping and killing my family.

Another Example:  Tuesday night
Daughter is playing her new video game and it's getting close to bedtime.  I tell her that she can play 5 more minutes and then she has to turn it off.  After giving her an extra 15 minutes, she starts arguing with me about turning it off until I yell at her to "TURN IT OFF!"  After she turns it off, she stomps upstairs and tattles to Husband.  Instead of backing me up, he asks me why I didn't just let her play another 5 minutes?  BECAUSE, MOTHERFUCKER, SHE ALREADY WENT 15 MINUTES OVER WHEN SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO GO TO BED?  Apparently, though, I'm the asshole because it's summer and Daughter "doesn't have to get up early to get to school".  No, she doesn't have to get up early to go to school, but she still has to get up early to go to her grandparents house.  And technically, she gets up in the morning at the same time as she did when she had school.  But no, I'm the asshole.  Me.

Another example:  Yesterday
I have been working late every night this week.  Yesterday,  I came into work and was thrilled to see my schedule clear (i.e., no client appointments, no court hearings) which meant I could tackle the ever-growing mound of work that has been piling up and piling up on my desk.  I get settled and am going through my work to prioritize it, and my boss flies into my office saying she needs my help on one of her cases.  You should know that she has been working on this FOR FREE.  The Defendant is her ex-husband.  I am working on shit for PAYING CLIENTS.  I tell her I'm buried alive.  She says she DESPERATELY needs my "help" and that it will only take "45 minutes".  An hour and a half later, I'm done "helping" -- and that help consisted of me proofreading her motion and brief.  THAT'S IT.  SERIOUSLY???  WHAT THE FUCK?  I had the biggest fucking attitude yesterday.  I'm pretty sure she just wanted moral support or whatever as she was working on this motion and brief, partly because it's dealing with a lesser-familar area of the law that what we practice everyday, but GROW-THE-FUCK UP.  Grrrr.

Another example:  Today
It's 2:25pm.  We have a client coming in at 5:00 to sign some documents.  My boss is supposed to finish drafting these documents before the client gets here (obviously).  She had an appointment with new clients at 11:00...which she ended up starting around 11:30.  THE PEOPLE JUST LEFT.  THREE HOURS???  Some other things you should know -- my boss loves the sound of her own voice.  (obviously again)  She best not pass the buck on to me to do those documents.  I swear I will spontaneously combust.  Or pop a blood vessel.  Or something akin to exploding.

Is it me?  Or am I just surrounded by fucking idiots and an overly-sassy child?  I need my meds adjusted.


The Cookie Lady said...

To me it sounds like you may be surrounded by some annoying people, but may also need a med adjustment. I used to get really angry over stupid shit, like people driving badly and I would be yelling at them from inside my car, like that was going to change anything. I ended up being angry at everyone for everything, it felt like - anyways, I changed meds and I feel much better. I hardly ever get angry at other drivers anymore! :) It may also have helped that I got rid of husband and replaced him with a better model. :)

Kim said...

I think you've had a lot going on and you deserve to be angry once in awhile. Or for a whole week. Either way.