I can't believe it's August 4th already. This summer has flown by. I guess it doesn't help that I have spent 2/3 of the summer studying. :( Ugh. I don't even want to get into The Bar Exam. It was a complete and total nightmare, and I had a complete and total MELT-DOWN last Tuesday night, which ended with me getting slightly drunk and crying myself to sleep because I was convinced I am a total failure. My losing my job doesn't help that thought either.
I am in such a crabby mood this evening, I want to scream at someone. I am frustrated in this whole job search because I have no fucking clue what direction to go in, and Pete keeps applying to jobs for me (doesn't bother to tell me, thankyouverymuch) and he is of the feeling that I should just GET A JOB. Doesn't matter what, just GET A JOB. I, of course, have a completely opposite attitude about it -- I am looking for the perfect job. He makes me insane. Everything lately makes me insane.
When am I going to catch a break? It doesn't help that my birthday is next week. This is the first year that I can remember dreading my birthday. Usually, I'm all over it. I'm excited. It's a day all about me, right? This year, I just want to crawl under a rock and have it be done already. I don't know if it is because I am getting older or because I am unemployed or if it's just a combination of everything. I know I am sounding all "poor me" -- but seriously.
I am just not in the mood to look for the silver lining tonight. Frig.